I often say it in classes, but I wanted to share it again here - our practise on the mat, and the real practise that continues off the mat, starts with awareness.
Awareness of what we think, how we feel, what's going on inside and around us, how do we relate to it all, reveal how we experience life and can show us where we get in our own way of enjoying it more fully.
But if the starting point is awareness, the practice from there splits in two ways for me:
A lot of unlearning and letting go of limiting beliefs and stories that keep me stuck in unhelpful and repetitive patterns
Replacing them with a mindset and outlook on life that can help and serve me.
I feel like a collector, but instead of post stamps or old coins, I collect and store light-bulb moments I find in books, or conversations, or when I finally listen to the inner wisdom that's been there all along. I literally keep a list of helpful mindset principles on my phone that I add on to as I stumble on something that shifts my perspective in an empowering way.
The one I wanted to share with you today is this mantra - In success or failure, I am the same. Repeat it until you believe it! I know it's a hard one to sell, but think about it:
If your sense of self-worth is contingent on the outcome,
then your sense of self-worth is contingent on the outcome.
I know I'm saying the same thing twice, but that's the point! It's easy to feel good about ourselves when we succeed, but what happens when we fail or the outcome is not what we wanted? Our sense of self-worth will fail us exactly when we need it the most.
So whenever I catch myself getting attached to and defined by outcomes - needing validation to feel worthy by achieving something or doubting my worth when something doesn't go as expected - I remind myself that whether it's success or failure it isn't a reflection on who I am, but rather something I experience. My ground, my base, my centre, my self-worth is inherent and independent from the circumstances and outcomes that will always fluctuate around me.
How this mindset gets even more expansive and empowering is that what motivates you to do, create or pursue something can then come from your passion instead of your insecurity and need for validation.
Coming back to yoga, that's a philosophy I try to bring with me on the mat as well - checking in regularly that my practice is not defined by outcomes, which poses I can or can't do, but is founded on the idea I am always enough and the practice itself is inspired by curiosity and exploration.
What about you, yogi? Do you have a habit of deriving your self-worth from outcomes? Does it work for you or against you when the outcome is not what you wanted?
I'd love to hear your thoughts 🧡